“Holy Water” by We the Kingdom

Music has a way of naming our feelings and putting punctuation to it. 

Listening to this song, which also fits quite perfectly within the back story of how we got to The Name River (and is, in fact, on the “River-Inspired playlist” created during this time), added an exclamation point to the transformation that started playing out the night prior. I was having a hard day and I started spiraling a bit mentally; can anyone relate? I was starting to find fault with everyone around me and I am admittedly not one who can just put on a face and power through….I mean, I can get mean, you guys.

Well we all have our strengths and we all have our weaknesses–we have our particular default settings that get flipped on when we get overwhelmed. And it’s very important for us to pinpoint what these are so that once they start sneaking up and taking root, we can pull those suckers right out of the ground! You have no home here!

I have learned that the real power comes not in stopping weaknesses dead in their tracks alone. That’s a significant start! But science!! Taking y’all back to science class, if an object is gaining momentum rolling down a hill, you can try to stop it which is a big effort for just a clumsy halt, OR you can redirect it to a different path, and it will keep going with the same strong speed, but now a strong speed in the right direction. 

So you can see where I’m going with this in that you can try to will yourself to “just stop” your bad attitude OR you can really emphasize this gust of negativity, not water it down at all, but really let it out and name these huge ugly feelings! And ask God to TRANSFORM that big energy being poured into a well of crap into a big energy being poured into a well of renewal! That’s where the power of the Gospel is; we need to admit our sinfulness in a big way! We need to see Jesus’s death on the cross FOR these mental ruts we find ourselves in as MIGHTY and NECESSARY. It is BEAUTIFUL to know there is a way out of misery that doesn’t ever go away–not to say things will get better (that’s not the “out”), but being freed from this feeling of being paralyzed by bad circumstances and letting them get us so off course –that is the “out” I am referring to. His grace is everlasting; we won’t run out of chances to get His grace. And you’d think He’d tire of us failing over and over again, but He requires it. It’s foolish to think we WON’T need it over and over our whole life–it’s a vital piece of the puzzle of the Gospel that we will never get it right–that is the WHOLE point.

“Show Them Jesus” by Jack Klumpenhower is a book introduced by one of my best friends and it has quite literally changed my life, so expect it to be quoted heavily in my blog! The author was speaking about the youth we are leading, and how they sense the difference between a teacher with integrity and a fake, how there is nothing they demand more than integrity. Read more of his words below:

“They want–and need–for us to be practicing believers in everyday life. They want us to be like Paul, who said, ‘Our gospel came to you not only in word, but also in power and in the Holy Spirit and with full conviction. You know what kind of men we proved to be among you for your sake’ (1 Thessalonians 1:5).

To teach the good news in that way is a daunting demand.. I mess it up regularly. In spite of our sinful blunders, though, we should not despair. The good news gives us tremendous hope. We can repent–daily, hourly, constantly. We can treasure God’s forgiveness over and over. We can believe that he counts us as saints and loves us as sons, and then we can believe bigger. We can be revived.

Sure, we catch ourselves serving idols and putting our fears ahead of God’s promises. But growth as a Christian is not about getting to a point where we stop sinning so much and do better on our own. It’s more about learning to depend on Jesus constantly, increasing in faith, and trusting him in our weakness. We need to teach the good news not just to our students but first to our own hearts. For me, this has to happen again and again. Every day.”

WOO-WHEE, we can find relief and freedom in this process of bringing our mess to God. Riley Clemmons has a song called “Broken Prayers” about this concept of messy prayer that is freeing, check out the lyrics HERE.

I ended that honest and raw prayer the other night with: “I can’t You must. I’m yours. Show me the way”…..that prayer from the film “Romero” that Nate brought into our initial prayers throughout the River trial is extremely fitting in this context of pouring our your heart out to God, asking Him to do what we know He can, what we know He wants to do…..forgive us, strengthen us, transform us. Let Him.